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Supporting children's confidence and self esteem

Supporting children’s confidence and self esteem

Thursday 14th October 2021

Find your local Three Little Birds Children's Nursery


Confidence and self esteem generally stems from how a person feels about themselves, and throughout our lives, most of us will experience peaks and troughs. However, in the early years, feeling a lack of confidence and self esteem presents much more of a challenge for little ones as it makes it much harder for them to try new things and make friends, as well as develop, learn and grow.  With all that said, Three Little Birds Children’s Nurseries has put together a blog to help parents identify the signs of low self esteem in children so that it can be tackled early on and their self esteem can be raised. 

How to understand the levels of self esteem in children

Not sure if your child has low self esteem or high self esteem? Don’t worry, here are some of the signs to look out for. 

High self esteem in children looks like:

  • Speaks positively about themselves
  • Are confident to speak up and try new things
  • Makes friends with ease
  • Is happy to play with others and on their own
  • Can adapt to change 
  • Learns from mistakes
  • Is proud of achievements

Low self esteem in children looks like:

  • Speaks negatively about themselves
  • Has a hard time making friends
  • Tends to sit alone
  • Does not deal with failure well
  • Avoids trying new things
  • Always thinks they could have done better
  • Is shy around others

There are many factors that can affect confidence and self esteem in children, and every child is different, but it’s good to remember that it doesn’t last forever and it can be improved.

How to boost confidence and self esteem in children

Here are some things that you can do to help boost your child’s self confidence and self esteem in schools and at home. 

Take an interest in their interests

Firstly, identify interests that make your child happy and engaged. This might be drawing, reading, listening to music, building Lego houses – whatever it is, tune into what holds their interest. Sit with them, ask them about the activity and put time aside to do what they love throughout the week so that they can boost their self esteem and build on their sense of self. 

If you sense fears or worries, talk about it

If you notice that your child is quieter than usual, or that they seem irritable, open up the conversation and ask them what’s bothering them. It might be that a child picked on them or that they feel frustrated with a drawing that didn’t turn out well, whatever it is, actively listen to their concerns.

When listening to a child, give them your undivided attention, sit facing them and use other positive body language to show them that you care. Don’t interrupt them, and offer them reassurance once they have confided in you. This is a good opportunity to share similar experiences to show them that they’re not alone. 

Give children small responsibilities

Age-appropriate chores around the home can assist when boosting confidence and self esteem in children. This helps them to feel competent and as able to complete tasks as their parents. Of course, be sure to offer praise and encouragement after they have completed their responsibilities. It might be something as simple as wiping the table but they will feel more comfortable and ready to take on new challenges as they grow. 

Focus on a child’s strengths

Instead of trying to push your child to be better at things they’re not good at, focus on what they are good at so that they feel more confident and have a higher level of self esteem. Once a child is more confident and has an increased level of self esteem, chances are, they will naturally become better at those things they weren’t so good at before. The mind is a powerful tool and if a child believes in themself, the rest will follow. 

Banish harsh criticisms 

A child that is told they aren’t good at something or that they’re lazy can become a self-fulling prophecy, so banish all harsh criticism. This doesn’t mean that you can’t coach children to do things better but knocking them down with negative words is only going to decrease confidence and self esteem. Raising a confident child is all about correcting them with patience. Children learn from seeing and then doing, so always teach them first and let them follow.   

Connect with Three Little Birds

At Three Little Birds Children’s Nurseries, we believe that the early years are the most precious, which is why we provide exemplary child care and child education services to ensure your child receives the very best. We offer a vast range of activities for your child to enjoy so that they can discover, learn and play to their heart’s content. 

If you would like to keep up to date with our top tips, activities and advice, please feel free to visit our news and blogs page. We update this on a regular basis as a way to share knowledge and support all parents.

And if you would like to enquire about spaces for your child at Three Little Birds, contact us today using our enquiry form, calling us (020 8003 5319) or emailing us (enquiries@threelittlebirdsnurseries.co.uk) and we’ll be right with you.